Adobo Magazine is holding a screening of some of the best Filipino indie films of 2009 but I won’t be able to make it because the commute is A FEW THOUSAND MILES.
What adds to my pain is that they just announced they’ll be showing Brillante Mendoza’s “Kinatay” instead of Brillante Mendoza’s “Lola”. Just keep replacing movies made by him with more movies made by him and i’ll swim over there myself.
So on April 23rd, instead of watching a movie about extra-judicial killings, a lonely accountant, and one of Quentin Tarantino’s favorites during last year’s Cannes, i’ll be hitting myself with a banana.
Engkwentro
The Arrival
Kinatay
It looks K-pop but it doesn’t look OPM (original Pilipino music).
Maybe its because I hate boy bands?
(via Celebrity Pulp)
Natatawa ko (I laugh)? More like natakot ako (im scared)!!! There’s nothing more entertaining and disconcerting than Filipino drag queens. But they’re hilarious either way.
Check out the best of both worlds below: the drag king/queen!
From cop cars in body kits to Philippine flags on kicks, A-Toy doesn’t stop!!
Mister Donut, na miss ko nimo uy! (Bisaya for “you’re the fucking best.”)
Oh wait a minute, I can put ice cream inside a doughnut anywhere in the world! Krispy Kreme donut with ube ice cream to the rescue!
(poster via Tatayk Files)
“You have been weighed and found wanting” was a pleasant suprise. I thought the movie was going to be as corny as the title and on top of that, it was from the 70’s. Regardless of location on this earth, nothing cool came out during the 70’s. My parents were young and single then, which is totally not cool for some reason.
But by the time a woman had an abortion and went crazy, and a young teenager played by a young Christopher de Leon got chewed out by his mom for putting on nut-huggers before church, I was entranced. And did I mention “Tinimbang Ka Ngunit Kulang” is the original title? Sounds a lot more romantic to me than the english version.
Speaking of romance, the movie had it all. Comedy, tragedy, love-making, and heart-breaking. But enough about the movie, lets talk about how hot Hilda Koronel was back then. (And maybe now? COUGAR ALERT!).
(photo via Pelikula ATBP)
She played Evangeline Ortega, a girl who was so fine she blew my mind. Unfortunately she dumps Chris de Leon’s character for some tall lanky dork. Did I mention she’s probably too old for me now? I probably should.
(photo via Pep.ph)
So instead i’ll safely fantasize about women within my age range (18 to 50). Like Iza Calzado above. I hear she is often compared to Hilda in terms of performance and beauty. I haven’t seen her act, but coincidentally, we have the same exact birthday. Which means she’s my soulmate and we’re meant to be together.
What was I talking about again? Oh yeah, COUGARS!
While walking down the street one day a Corrupt Philippine Senator was tragically hit by a car and died.
His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
“Welcome to heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, there seems to be a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.”
“No problem, just let me in,” says the Senator.
“Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.”
“Really? I’ve made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,” says the Senator.
“I’m sorry, but we have our rules.”
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the Filipino people.
They played a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar, and the finest champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes.
They are all having such a good time that before the Senator realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises…
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him, “Now it’s time to visit heaven.”
So, 24 hours passed with the Senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
“Well, then, you’ve spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.”
The Senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: “Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.”
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open and he’s in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders.
“I don’t understand,” stammers the Senator. “Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?”
The devil smiles at him and says, “Yesterday we were campaigning … today, you voted.”
Just found photos from Hypebeast on more “Manny-makin’” merchandise. Cha-ching from the ring to the… uh… thing.
Awww shiet, astig ng bandila di ba?
This is my favorite part of the jacket. Its totally reminiscent of the Philippine-way of family representation. Names of family members, especially the nicknames of one’s children, can be found plastered on every small mom-n-pop shop (sari-sari store), jeepney, and tricycle.
(via Hypebeast)
The top two most prolific, gifted, and well-informed Filipino-American rappers from the American West Coast came together and made an astig-ass music video riddled with FMA (Filipino martial arts).
It’s called “Slow Down,” but Bambu and Prometheus Brown aren’t slowing down anytime soon.
“A parking lot for a motor shop used to be owned by mom and pop, now its where your grande late’s can get bought.”
-Bambu
“You should of been studying WEB instead of WB its WWE this is not TV”
-Prometheus Brown
I don’t know if I got the quotes right because of the lightning-speed flows, but I tried.
